so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
Randomize
