I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize
