omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
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