i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
Randomize
