I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
This toilet bowl is my home.
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
Randomize
