I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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