my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
she asked me if the dress made her look fat, i told her no - the fat made her look fat.
there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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