Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Randomize
