tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
Randomize
