I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
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