fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
why did i make a hit list last night containing only McDonalds?
you tried to order a magarita mcflurry and when they said they didnt make those you tried to call 911
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
that's an acceptable place to lick
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
Randomize
