I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
I want a musical about memes.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
Randomize
