I'm lost and stupid without you.
R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize
