Texts From Last Night

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  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high

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  (405): when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high http://tfl.nu/6j5i
  Replies (69) Good night (3605) Bad night (806)
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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day

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  (973): What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day http://tfl.nu/bp9q
  Replies (36) Good night (6205) Bad night (1248)
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  (520): View more from Arizona

  She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.

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  (520): She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist. http://tfl.nu/mma2
  Replies (35) Good night (4513) Bad night (1303)
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  (561): View more from Florida

  I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."

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  (561): I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead." http://tfl.nu/np5o
  Replies (2) Good night (3144) Bad night (1177)
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  (815): View more from Illinois

  i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried

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  (815): i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried http://tfl.nu/ujpo
  Replies (6) Good night (3545) Bad night (982)
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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.

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  (570): I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned. http://tfl.nu/iuhj
  Replies (20) Good night (1127) Bad night (3217)
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  (334): View more from Alabama

  Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.

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  (334): Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine. http://tfl.nu/200d
  Replies (6) Good night (2056) Bad night (595)
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.

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  (612): She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity. http://tfl.nu/b3pk
  Replies (18) Good night (954) Bad night (1342)
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  (778): View more from British Columbia

  Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%

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  (778): Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25% http://tfl.nu/4mvy
  Replies (5) Good night (1113) Bad night (585)
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  (517): View more from Michigan

  Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.

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  (517): Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door. http://tfl.nu/ryl2
  Replies (10) Good night (734) Bad night (1644)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it

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  (503): Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it http://tfl.nu/r81k
  Replies (14) Good night (3301) Bad night (564)
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  (647): View more from Ontario

  He was the one that got away. From my vagina.

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  (647): He was the one that got away. From my vagina. http://tfl.nu/504c
  Replies (8) Good night (1498) Bad night (543)
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  (818): View more from California

  whose ass print is on the piano?

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  (818): whose ass print is on the piano? http://tfl.nu/s2mm
  Replies (9) Good night (1459) Bad night (437)
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  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.

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  (306): Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians. http://tfl.nu/ykxr
  Replies (8) Good night (1191) Bad night (481)
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  (415): View more from California

  Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.

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  (415): Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN. http://tfl.nu/d27u
  Replies (5) Good night (506) Bad night (969)

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