How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
