what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Randomize
