Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
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