S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
i woke up today to a handjob from this really fat girl that keeps calling me michael phelps
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
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