It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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