There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
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