At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
I'm like, not good at living.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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