Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize