sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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