stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
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