Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
the condom got lost in my hair
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
Drake has all the answers
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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