i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
