my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
Randomize