are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
