She's like a pop up book from hell.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
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