Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
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