Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
Randomize