the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
I just ate a cockroach and I want to be a fire truck.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
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