this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Randomize