is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
Randomize
