She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Randomize
