Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
Randomize
