Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
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