come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Randomize
