What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
she looked like the before picture.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
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Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize