Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
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