i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
Randomize