Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize