Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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