She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
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