New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
I just want to make out with him forever
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Randomize
