Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Randomize
