I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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