yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
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