Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
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