i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
It's never too late to be topless.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
