But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize